Dennis is one of the most fastidious members of the group. As a matter of fact, he's the only one of them who tries to wear fresh clothes. Though his wounds -- not to mention the odd license plate through the chest -- usually ruin his new threads. Dennis was raised to believe that anything that makes you feel good must be bad for you. A lifetime of repression, coupled with a compulsive need to be tidy, don't make for being a good flesh-eating ghoul. Abstaining from most things is a way of life for ol' Dennis -- hence,  Josh's nicknaming him "Dickless".


Colton's always gone against the grain. In second grade he drove his teacher to tears, arguing that the word "octopus" only had one syllable if you said it fast enough, and that only a cow as stupid as she couldn't see that. He loves movies you've never seen, and music you've never heard of. He says all the things you'd never say, and thinks things you've never thought. When it comes to being an undead monster, this contrarian would rather eat a bullet than live up to what society thinks a zombie should be. He just won't give anyone the fucking satisfaction.


If eating people were easier -- like you could just call for them to be delivered to your door, like pizza or Chinese take-out -- maybe he would partake in the flesh. But that is not the case. People run and scream and fight. Josh didn't run before he returned from the grave, and he sure as hell isn't going to start now. Actually, Josh didn't do much of anything. Though recent circumstances have forced him to give at least half a shit, that's still only half a shit more than none at all.


Lisa's always gone with the crowd. She dressed the way they dressed, talked the way they talked, and when they all turned into blood-thirsty flesh-eaters, she did the same. Sort of. But eating people is gross. She's always been a picky eater, and there's something about the texture of raw, human flesh that's just wrong. So the crowd moved on, leaving Lisa to fend for herself -- something she's never been particularly good at. Then she met the Dickheads -- and while they're not her ideal companions, they'll do until someone cooler comes along.